She called me. (what i was thinking during her initial "preface" is in small red letters)
"I'm a horribly romantic person by nature, and i just can't help it...the biggest thrill in my success is sharing that--and not just with those i am romantically inclined toward. I make a lot of money and i give a lot away...being able to do good with it--that's what it's for.
I want you to know that before i ever came to Eureka and met you in the lobby of the hotel, that i never thought you were a Dean-Koontz-rich novelist...(I'm sure you could write this and it would be beautiful...) yeah yeah but i wish you could enjoy that with me. I knew you were a starving artist- I'm not starving at all. I have my own money. that was attractive. because you need to be a sugar-mamma? I've been with women who were my corporate peer--if i wanted that, i could have that. That woman in Kansas City, the bank president-- begged me to go out with her again. The fact that you don't live like that, warms my heart. You don't have to talk to me about your budget...i don't care. Again, it's not ABOUT you. I don't need you to buy me things. Not the point. When you gave me that cardboard Lucky Charms cutout, that meant more to me than anything...it wasn't meant to mean more to you than anything. it was meant to be a joke and to keep things light. I don't want to overwhelm you- I think my nature does that. your nature needs to have control of the purse strings, and to feel somehow 'above' your girlfriends. I can't stand it that you haven't been treated that way- it breaks my heart- when did i become some charity case? I don't want you to feel badly about accepting things from me--"
"Look, SP," I said. " all that is pertinent, but not really the issue here. The issue is, i need to feel certain things in order to develop anything long-term. I know what i want and--"
"It's not me."
"Well, that's a little harsh--"
"But true."
"You are not my type, no. And i just didn't feel what i wanted to feel--"
Angrily, she retorts, "Well i was feeling that spark, and i thought you were too and that's why we SLEPT together, Jae! I'm in a whole other alternate reality, i guess...i gotta get off the phone so i can call all my friends and tell them--'oops--i was wrong. I thought i met this special woman who felt something for me'--"
"Now just back up the truck, SP. First of all, we BOTH wanted to find that special person. And we BOTH had needs that we wanted to fill, Bottom line. And we're both grownups, as you're so fond of pointing out. There is no way that 7 days is going to seal us into couplehood. I think it's really easy to superimpose things on the situation that may or may not be accurate. I will not be blamed for your premature announcement to all your friends. You were making some huge presumptions. I know what i need to feel and i simply didn't feel it--even though i gave it a shot."
"Jae, sometimes it doesn't come on like a light bulb."
"This DOES. That's my point. Maybe we're talking about two different things. Real love takes time. I'm not talking about falling in love, right now--i'm talking about feeling that attraction, that chemistry, that spark, the first minute you meet someone...i'm looking for my soulmate. You have to understand that."
"Well i hope you find your fucking soulmate."
"Don't you DARE talk to me that way. I shared that with you because I thought you deserved to know. Don't make it ugly. I understand you're hurt, but you can't turn that on me. I'm not the enemy, nor am i responsible for your feelings. Things just happen or don't happen and it's a myth--a lie we tell ourselves-- that we have any control over it. But it serves no purpose to make it ugly--and ultimately, it won't make you feel better or bring any love into your life."
"Whatever."
"Whatever? SP, your reaction to this is way too intense for the short time we saw each other. You really need to sort this out. See someone, please."
"I just can't believe you gave up so quick, Jae, we had so much potential."
"If you think that my only value was as a girlfriend or lover, then you've sorely underestimated me."
...the rest of the conversation escapes me. That was just what i had taken notes on...
3 of 5: Sullied Pajamas in 3D
"I'm a horribly romantic person by nature, and i just can't help it...the biggest thrill in my success is sharing that--and not just with those i am romantically inclined toward. I make a lot of money and i give a lot away...being able to do good with it--that's what it's for.I want you to know that before i ever came to Eureka and met you in the lobby of the hotel, that i never thought you were a Dean-Koontz-rich novelist...(I'm sure you could write this and it would be beautiful...) yeah yeah but i wish you could enjoy that with me. I knew you were a starving artist- I'm not starving at all. I have my own money. that was attractive. because you need to be a sugar-mamma? I've been with women who were my corporate peer--if i wanted that, i could have that. That woman in Kansas City, the bank president-- begged me to go out with her again. The fact that you don't live like that, warms my heart. You don't have to talk to me about your budget...i don't care. Again, it's not ABOUT you. I don't need you to buy me things. Not the point. When you gave me that cardboard Lucky Charms cutout, that meant more to me than anything...it wasn't meant to mean more to you than anything. it was meant to be a joke and to keep things light. I don't want to overwhelm you- I think my nature does that. your nature needs to have control of the purse strings, and to feel somehow 'above' your girlfriends. I can't stand it that you haven't been treated that way- it breaks my heart- when did i become some charity case? I don't want you to feel badly about accepting things from me--"
"Look, SP," I said. " all that is pertinent, but not really the issue here. The issue is, i need to feel certain things in order to develop anything long-term. I know what i want and--"
"It's not me."
"Well, that's a little harsh--"
"But true."
"You are not my type, no. And i just didn't feel what i wanted to feel--"
Angrily, she retorts, "Well i was feeling that spark, and i thought you were too and that's why we SLEPT together, Jae! I'm in a whole other alternate reality, i guess...i gotta get off the phone so i can call all my friends and tell them--'oops--i was wrong. I thought i met this special woman who felt something for me'--"
"Now just back up the truck, SP. First of all, we BOTH wanted to find that special person. And we BOTH had needs that we wanted to fill, Bottom line. And we're both grownups, as you're so fond of pointing out. There is no way that 7 days is going to seal us into couplehood. I think it's really easy to superimpose things on the situation that may or may not be accurate. I will not be blamed for your premature announcement to all your friends. You were making some huge presumptions. I know what i need to feel and i simply didn't feel it--even though i gave it a shot."
"Jae, sometimes it doesn't come on like a light bulb."
"This DOES. That's my point. Maybe we're talking about two different things. Real love takes time. I'm not talking about falling in love, right now--i'm talking about feeling that attraction, that chemistry, that spark, the first minute you meet someone...i'm looking for my soulmate. You have to understand that."
"Well i hope you find your fucking soulmate."
"Don't you DARE talk to me that way. I shared that with you because I thought you deserved to know. Don't make it ugly. I understand you're hurt, but you can't turn that on me. I'm not the enemy, nor am i responsible for your feelings. Things just happen or don't happen and it's a myth--a lie we tell ourselves-- that we have any control over it. But it serves no purpose to make it ugly--and ultimately, it won't make you feel better or bring any love into your life."
"Whatever."
"Whatever? SP, your reaction to this is way too intense for the short time we saw each other. You really need to sort this out. See someone, please."
"I just can't believe you gave up so quick, Jae, we had so much potential."
"If you think that my only value was as a girlfriend or lover, then you've sorely underestimated me."
...the rest of the conversation escapes me. That was just what i had taken notes on...
3 of 5: Sullied Pajamas in 3D
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